Mittwoch, 8. August 2018
Breaking Through - The Artists' Headf*** and what I'll do about it !
If you're an artist like me whose life revolves around music in one form or another you might have been where I've been finding myself lately - Music isn't just a hobby, it's a profession, you stopped playing just for fun itself! It seems utterly important to become a perfectionist, edit more than you're being creative, trying to get that perfect take instead of doing what you used to... it's such a hard balance and bluntly sometimes put a headf***!
Music used to be my cry for life, my lifeline, my therapy, my hearts desire, my I can't live without!
And it still is! If it was taken away from me I'd die of heartbreak! Yet it has also become a burden, to be more successful, to ever better myself, to reach higher and higher, getting up again after every fall and disappointment, cause how can I not? Like I said, it would be my internal death. So I keep going, sometimes I keep avoiding, I keep hiding, I keep squeezing my creativity.
I'm saying "f*** it" to all of the above for a while!
I fell in music cause it's deep inside me and has the power to build me up and break my inner fears, connect me to something higher and help me express what I would have otherwise expressed in unhealthy behaviours. Now my unhealthy behaviour has become being in the music industry. Whilst I will not work any less hard on my projects, I will let loose for a while and just record some acoustic songs, raw, with minimum editing ! Some of you might not like that and that's fine, I will get more electronic music out (next Trance release is almost confirmed)https://soundcloud.com/mayawolff/maya-wolff-breakthrough! But I need to step back and reconnect with that teenage girl that wouldn't have survived without her piano and writing countless songs!
Here's a song I wrote in 2014 before this headf*** started - I spent a few weeks at my mum's house until I found somewhere to live in Brighton to start a new life there. I can still feel every line in this song and it's my cry now as it was then!
I hope you enjoy it and will enjoy a series of acoustic tracks going on my Soundcloud over the next few weeks!